SALES MANAGER VERY SUPPORTIVE OF INTERN WHO QUIT VIA EMAIL

Chicago, IL

Early Monday morning, Groupon, INC. intern Mario Betcha resigned after just two months via email. Sales manager Ryan Gray responded abruptly, crafting a heartfelt and personal note to wish Mario the best, holding no grudges whatsoever.

“I got the message Mario sent first thing when I stepped in the office. Naturally, I immediately began composing a list of all the strengths Mario had highlighted during his short stint with the company,” said Mr. Gray. He then leaped onto his desk, knocking off piles of important documents, and gave a genuine and profound speech about the vast hole Mr. Betcha left in the company, second only to the hole in his heart.

“By the way, he was crying, and by the words he was saying, I thought Mario had died,” said receptionist Reta Boatright. Mario is alive and well, and yet sales manager Ryan Gray spent the rest of the morning creating a portrait of Mario on the break room refrigerator using only Post-it notes. People around the office had a lot to say about the day’s events.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong, the dude has serious Post-it skills, but my tuna sammy was in that fridge, and like I didn’t wanna mess up the refrigerator art. So I didn’t eat all day,” Sarah O’Neil, the remaining intern, told us.

“That’s just the kind of guy Ryan is. He and the company as a whole really care about the people they work with. I see things like that everyday,” said CEO, Rich Williams.

As the day concluded, Mr. Gray felt he hadn’t done enough, so he hired a mariachi band to deliver a musical invitation to Mario, letting him know that Ryan and his new fiancée would love to have him over for a meal anytime Mario liked.

— A Well-Mannered Grump