Chicago, IL

Dylan Richter, pondering existence and the general good.

Dylan Richter, pondering existence and the general good.

It has become customary for Dylan Richter (31) to wake up at the sound of the two little goddamn yippie ass chihuahuas that live beneath him. Richter knows to expect nature’s alarm clock to greet him every morning promptly at 6:32 am, two minutes after their landlord’s alarm rings. Today, Tuesday June 4th, 2019, Richter was awake come 6:32. He had already made a cup of black coffee and was enjoying it on his back porch when the two chihuahuas were let out promptly at 6:32. Today, now that Richter could see the dogs and not just have his sleep interrupted by their yappity yippty ass fricking barks, the chihuahuas were actually kinda cute.

When asked why he had a different experience Richter responded quickly, as if he had been waiting to tell someone. “Well that's an interesting question Mr. Reporter. You seen in the past I was burdened by what I thought to be an inconvenience put on this planet solely to disturb my sleeping schedule. Mr. Reporter, it turns out that I only felt the way I did because I was only experiencing one side of the occurrence, one side of what the world had to tell me. If each and every one of us took the time to see how cute those little goddamn yippie ass chihuahuas can be, the world would be a much better place.”

We will take a moment to acknowledge that this was one of the most enlightened responses to a question we had ever heard and we encourage those reading this story to take a moment in your everyday life and think. Think about what the other side has to say and why they are saying it. Do not immediately disregard another simply because they do not think what you do.  

To close we should mention that since our interview with Mr. Dylan Richter, he has announced his plans to run for State Representative as a member of the Libertarian Party.

— A Well-Mannered Grump