All good things must come to an end and Trish Patricia’s (13) amazing summer at sleep away camp is no different. You see while Patricia’s self-esteem was booming during her time in the woods engaging in real face to face conversation with a diverse group of children her own age she was in for a rude awakening upon her return home.
In just the first half hour back in the nutmeg state (Connecticut) Patricia was greeted with a flurry of texts she had missed all summer that brought her back down to earth.
“Just because you made friends this summer doesn't change the fact that you were one of the last girls in our grade to get her period. LOL kidding LAWL c u soon bb.” wrote Becky Benson (13 ½).
FYI Trish, Riley Joyce gave me a handie at Blake’s 4th of July pool party thing you missed so like we’re together now.” scribed Brian Tanner (14).
“Ur tits still flat as fuk.” typed Brooke Smith.
In minutes all the hard work of the counselors, all the money paid by Patricia’s parents, and all the hope that was built up was flushed right down the drain. Reality struck and Trish Patricia fell back to the earth she knew all too well. She knew an earth of passive aggressive everything and authenticity honest nothing.
To the right is a projected timeline until she leaves for camp next summer.
It should be noted we project her to pick up “Julling”.
-A Well-Mannered Grump